Skating on thin ice can get you into hot water

England and America are two countries separated by a common language
Language is a funny thing, especially English as we have so many idioms, proverbs, clichés etc. I've found myself flitting between being very English (saying golly, gosh, jolly hockey sticks), and adopting a slight accent which is neither French nor German, but kind of European with a hint of American. It's no wonder that people don't usually have a clue what I am talking about.

I say potato, and you say... patata, pomme de terre, Kartoffel

I was in a shop on Saturday, and asked the sales assistant (in my very best French) if she had a pair of boots in a size 38. She looked bemused, before asking me in broken English if I spoke English. I was rather insulted, as I'd checked my French and have been told I have a good accent. Of course, I then realised she didn't speak French! Classic - silly of me to presume that a shop assistant in the very centre of Brussels would speak French!

Everyone else in the centre seemed to be English... my Romanian friend and I went for coffee at 'Drug Opera - the most famous pub corner in Brussels' - which coincidentally does rather nice crêpes - and were gazing in envy at the sundaes and crêpes at the next table. We then had a short conversation about 'bingo wings' and 'food babies' (her English is very good, but ridiculously colloquial), before realising that the people gorging themselves on ice-cream were English, and were finding our conversation hilarious. Our coffee did come with a scoop of (ice-)cream, a wafer biscuit and a mini chocolate though so we didn't feel too smug and skinny!


I speak as I find
Anyway, it got me thinking about language - something I love, and which I've studied in many variations. I mentioned it to my housemates (who are German), and we traded idioms. These are a few that spring to mind, and they are very wise:

• Was Hänschen nicht lernte, lernt Hans nimmer mehr. (What little Hans didn't learn, (grown-up) Hans will never learn) - You can't teach an old dog new tricks
• Dumm fickt gut (Simpleminded fucks well) - Blondes have more fun
• Eigenlob stinkt (self-praise stinks) - Don't blow your own trumpet

It was quite fun trying to explain them though, particularly 'pot calling the kettle black'!

Toilet Humour

My English friend left work yesterday, so we went to a pizzarium (no idea), and had the 'all you can eat buffet'. It wasn't an option. Either we all did, or we all just had individual slices. 

So the Italian owner (in his slippers), and his wife (drinking wine) brought out wooden boards with pizza slices (and by slice I mean 4cm x 6cm) on. We didn't get to choose... so we got Margherita (on ciabatta bread, but nice), and then Quattro Formaggio (no tomato sauce but OK). Then it got strange. There was (among others):

• Courgette and smoked salmon (none of us tried this)
• Aubergine and parmesan (a bit weird)
• Potato and cream cheese (so wrong)
• Gouda and black truffle paste (tasted like anchovies - bleurgh)... 
• Feta with rocket and sundried tomatoes (different)

After he'd brought out 6 varieties, he told us we could now choose which slices we wanted. Most of us were full, but after 4 'slices' I definitely hadn't had my 10.90€ worth (I am my mother's daughter), so I nibbled another two on principle.

Meanwhile, my Austrian friend had got up to use the toilet, and ten minutes later reappeared from a side door looking embarrassed. She'd only gone upstairs into the owner's apartment... it wasn't until she found the bedroom that she realised she'd gone wrong! I don't know if she confused privée with privy, but it was quite funny, and the Italian guy was in hysterics!

For my part, it was Greek to me
So earlier today I was explaining to my colleague that if he went to London for the weekend he wouldn't have to spend loads of money on eating out because of our voucher scheme. I received an email from Zizzi offering me two courses for £12.95, so I used this as an example.


"I like Zizzi. It's pretty good, and you can often get it for half price. Plus there are loads in London."
He looked at me oddly, and raised his eyebrows. "What?! Is that the name of a restaurant? Do you know what Zizi means in French?"


I looked it up. 


zizi (familier) /zizi/masculine nounwilly (familier) GB, wiener (familier) US, penis.

zizi	nm		ding-a-ling
zizi	nm	Familier Colloquial	dink
zizi	nm		dick

So that was unfortunate...  

In other news...

• I start ice-skating lessons tomorrow
• I know far too much about forklift trucks
• I finally have my lunch vouchers - €6 a day and you get change in cash
• I fly to Cyprus on Wednesday
• I've been here just over one month
• I've read the only books I brought with me
• It's 73 days until Christmas

And on that note... I need to go and do yoga because I have a bikini to wear!